1st place at Edubirdie essay writing contest.
Author: Madeeha Kafeel
Life is about exploring one’s environment, it is all about treading the least travelled paths and it is about enjoying and living in a particular moment. In life, the most efficient form of learning happens from travelling. I am very much fond of travelling and there are many places in this world which I like to visit but there is this single place on this planet earth towards which I have developed some mixed feelings of horror and disgust. It seems weird but I don’t want any money and I don’t care about any reward for whatever happens, I would hate to visit the very place on earth where I’m going to get married in near future.
For an optimistic person, marriage is like a walk in a park but for a realistic man this park is more like a Jurassic park. Today, when I am young and passionate, I am not getting emotional. For me life is precious and no matter what I would never like to take a stroll in this monstrous park. That reminds me of a norm in my country when a girl at her wedding day wears heavy jewelry and cladded in heavy dress, she is bound to keep her head low and without lifting her eyes she has to bear the inquiring looks of her in-laws who love to find faults in her appearance. Now, the way these women look at young bride is much like the way in which the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park examine their food before eating it.
I am afraid of taking a walk down an aisle towards the end of which there is only darkness and despair. There is a saying that if you are right and you get shut-up than you are married and I being the dreamer in life would never like to see myself getting confined in such a narrow environment. There exist women who despite of being educated prefer to remain silent at their homes and it is their husband’s voice which always carries weight and these women who are not allowed to share their opinions are considered nothing but narrow-minded housewives. My friend is one such house-wife. She is highly educated and despite being university topper, she is bound to live a life with a man who shows no respect for her. Now, she is living in a modern world but can’t leave her husband, for her parents are against her decision.
Observing my friend’s situation, I can understand very well that why marriage is called a gamble and still there are girls who dream to become brides in their lives but what is the purpose of getting into a relationship when the outcome of tension and financial problems is very much evident? I have observed my parents. My father works in an office and my mother is one who takes the responsibility of paying bills. My mother’s job is stressful; for she is the one who keeps track of all financial transactions at home but it is my father who receives the praise and this always give rise to rift and tension in my home.
There can be many reasons for which the girls wanted to get married. Maybe they wanted to get loved or wanted to feel protected but the strength of this relationship depends on sacrifice from both sides and most of the time it is the woman who is expected to make sacrifice. So, at times wives only become a machine who gives birth to a child every year. I have observed my sister whose five kids always keep her so busy that she finds little or no time to comb her hair. Her husband is more like a care-free guy who simply don’t care about anything at home and all he wants is but rest and sleep. My sister has lost all her interest in life and these days when she is thirty, she appears as if she is forty.
Before getting married my sister loved reading and every time when I opens a book in my library, I can’t help noticing a corner where my sister would kept her favorite books . I and my sister both loved to read Jane Austen. This English writer who is famous for her comment upon the life of British landed gentry never got married but it hardly makes any difference for we know her from her writings and today her powerful novels are considered among classic in literature. There was also the Queen Elizabeth the first. Life was tough for her but she reigned for forty- four years, she too never got married and last but not the least here is an example of Florence Nightingale. We know her as a nurse but she was also a writer and a statistician. Florence knew the purpose of her life. She was aware that marital life would become an obstacle for her in her way of helping mankind. Thus, in order to help others Florence decided not to get married and she never regretted her decision.
I am not pessimist but I am very much realistic, I have my dreams and I have my desires and these days when my parents are busy in selecting the location for me to get married, I am taking it as a death-sentence. I am not ready to play this gamble because for any money and for any reward in a world, I would never like to be in a place where signing a consent means the end of my freedom.