How to Create and Sustain Connections with Meaning and Purpose (Part)

SAMPLE CHAPTER 1 INTRODUCTION Have you ever searched for the term “mentor” or “mentoring” on the internet? If you have, you know there are hundreds of websites dedicated to mentoring that offer their own tips and advice. Why then, do you need to read this book? After decades of research on mentoring1 and its importance for career success, we are always surprised to learn how few of our colleagues, students, and professional friends consider mentoring a critical component of their career development. Frankly, this is because the journals that publish this research are not very accessible to anyone outside of academia. It can also be traced to the growth of formal mentoring programs, such that the label of “mentor” has come to have a formal designation. We believe that many of us now have such idealized visions of who a mentor needs to be and what they should do that we no longer recognize or foster informal mentoring relationships. Wait, informal mentoring relationships? Yes- and this is one of the most important findings from academic research- informal mentoring relationships are more effective than formal ones. Now, formal mentoring programs do help and certainly have a place in organizations. But the research is irrefutable that informal relationships provide more of every benefit. As professors, we’ve spent years studying mentoring. We’ve read hundreds of academic studies, interviewed research participants, and analyzed survey findings from our own and others’ data 1 Key references: Allen & Eby, 2007; Dobrow, Chandler, Murphy, & Kram, 2012; Higgins & Kram, 2001; Kram, 1985; Ragins & Kram, 2007. collection efforts. We’ve asked people to fill out complex questionnaires and to map their mentoring relationships. Each of us has created and run mentoring and coaching programs and assisted organizations with their programs. We’ve consulted with large and small organizations, spoken with executives and consultants, and discussed mentoring at conferences with people from all over the world. And we’d like to share a few conclusions with you. Leaders- at all levels- face a more tumultuous and uncertain work environment than ever before. However as workplace challenges have increased, organizations have shifted much of the responsibility for leadership development and career management to the individual- yes, you! Thus, the self-directed career managed by the person— or self-leadership- has replaced traditional formulas for success. In this environment, each of us must create stability and certainty for ourselves. Relationships are critical resources for career development, and mentors can be a key source of stability in assisting you to successfully adapt to career challenges and grow as a leader. Supporting these facts, the research on mentoring consistently demonstrates that protégés have higher salaries, are promoted faster, and are more satisfied with their careers. In fact, the latter two points are why many organizations created formal mentoring programs as part of their HR strategy. But recent research shows that if you have a network of mentors then each of these benefits could be even greater. When you combine these findings- that informal mentoring relationships are more effective and that a network of mentors increases the benefits- the reasons this book was needed become clear. Everyone needs to become an entrepreneurial protégé. ************ Traditional mentoring and boundaryless careers The traditional mentor–protégé relationship consists of a junior person- the protégé -paired with a senior, more experienced colleague- the mentor- most often within the same organization. We celebrate mentors and their contributions across history, beginning with Greek mythology and philosophy. The original Mentor appeared in Homer’s Odyssey as a teacher and protector of his son, Telemachus. Over time, the word mentor has come to mean someone who imparts wisdom and knowledge to their protégé. Recall that among Greek philosophers, Socrates was a mentor to Plato, who in turn was Aristotle’s mentor. And traditional mentors have been heralded by their protégés as life changing. Take for example, Warren Buffet, CEO of Berkshire Hathaway and one of the richest men in the world. He credits economist Ben Graham, author of The Intelligent Investor, as an important influence in his career development. In turn, Warren Buffet has mentored Bill Gates, founder of Microsoft and now a world-renown philanthropist. Traditional mentors offer wise counsel and support, and may serve as important resources if you are lucky enough to have one. But several recent trends have combined to make relying on one traditional mentor a risky strategy. First, people rarely spend their entire career in one organization. We are no longer dependent on organizations to define our careers and most of us will work for more than one organization. Second, we live in a global world which often requires new skills and the capacity to learn from new people and experiences. This means that different people will be more or less helpful in different contexts. Third, technology is always evolving and keeps us connected at all hours. There are fewer and fewer barriers between work and home, which forces all of us to make decisions as to when and how to engage (or disengage) in our work and personal lives. Finally, and this brings us back to those Greek philosophers, the only constant is change (Heraclitus). While this has obviously been true for a long time, the pace of change has become increasingly rapid and overwhelming. Our colleagues Michael Arthur and Denise Rousseau captured many of these trends with their conception of the “boundaryless” career2. Modern careers break down many traditional boundaries or barriers. Most importantly, you are likely to think about your career as independent from the particular organization that employees you. Even within your company, it is likely that there are fewer boundaries between hierarchical levels due to “restructuring” (e.g., delayering, downsizing, or rightsizing) and the increase in team-based work and more informal work cultures. Thanks to technology, you may work from home or the local coffee shop or the airport or anywhere at any time. You may move in and out of the workforce or make nontraditional career moves, such as taking a lateral position or even stepping down to learn new skills. And you will be challenged to work with diverse colleagues or clients, on a global assignment, or on a virtual team. 2 Arthur & Rousseau, 1996. And, as the world continues to change at a rapid pace, you as an individual will be required to adapt to changing opportunities and work requirements. Our colleague, Tim Hall, calls the new career the “protean career3”. Proteaus was the Greek god who could change shape at a moment’s notice to meet the conditions that he faced. While it may not be as quickly as a moment, we are all faced with the reality that changing our skill set and our job multiple times is exceedingly likely in the current context. Modern careers require a network of mentors All of the challenges in your career will be easier to navigate if you can access help from a network of mentors with a variety of backgrounds and perspectives. This diversity enables mentors in different roles to take action that helps you, such as sponsoring and advocating for your promotion or coaching you through a job change. Your mentoring relationships are developmental because they contribute to your growth and career advancement. Beyond traditional mentoring relationships, support from other senior leaders or your peers as may be developmental as well. This is why in academic research we call it your “developmental network” – it includes a variety of relationships that support your career development. Keep in mind that your developmental network is a subset of your overall network, so this is not a book about networking in a purely instrumental sense. Don’t get us wrong, networking can be an important part of your career and you may in fact meet future mentors in the process of networking. But your developmental network is distinctive in its focus on your personal and professional career growth, and requires self-awareness, a range of critical social skills, and 3 Hall, 2002. persistence. In this sense, you want to carefully build relationships to be highly supportive and effective for you. When you are able to do this, both you and your developer will value the connection that you have created. It is important to note that both mentoring roles you may take- as a protégé and as a mentor- are developmental. Research has shown that mentors get similar career benefits as protégés as well as gain meaning in their work by passing on their knowledge and wisdom. This mutual learning and growth is perhaps the most important part of the mentoring process. It is a myth that only the protégé benefits from this kind of developmental relationship. In fact, both parties also have the potential to develop self-awareness, new knowledge and skills, and to contribute to the learning of the other when the relationship is based on trust, effective communication, and a commitment to the partnership. Very successful people apply their talents in a many ways as their careers take shape over time. Part of that experience often includes being a protégé and then becoming a mentor yourself. Media mogul Oprah Winfrey is a highly visible example of a mentor that has fostered a network of protégés. She has mentored “Dr. Phil” McGraw, helped develop expert and author Dr. Mehmet Oz, created opportunities for designer Nate Berkus, launched financial guru Suze Orman’s television career, and made chef Rachael Ray a household name. When talking about her own success, Oprah credits one of her mentors, Maya Angelou. Oprah calls Angelou a “mentor-mother-sister-friend,” highlighting the different roles a mentor may take depending on the needs of their protégé. What is an Entrepreneurial Protégé? When you ask a room full of executives (and we do this regularly), “What makes a good protégé?” you get a list of admirable traits. They tell us, a protégé should be… open-minded, motivated, thoughtful, passionate, willing to learn, and most importantly, respectful of their time and efforts. Leaders want their protégés to be trustworthy, loyal, diligent, and grateful. And the list goes on as you can imagine. Our colleague Dawn Chandler calls this “relational savvy,” those attitudes and skills that enable you to build relationships that foster your personal and career growth4. We see over and over again that people are able to make significant progress in their careers through their developmental relationships. Take Nina5 for example. She had been promoted quickly up the ranks of the Menswear Division of a national retailer, but her real passion was cosmetics. She was encouraged by her fiancé, who also worked there, and her good friend/colleague to try to pursue her interests by getting to know people in the cosmetics area. At the company-wide holiday event, Nina introduced herself to Bob, Vice President of the Cosmetics Division, and chatted with him about some new lines that she liked as well as new trends she had noticed in other boutique stores. Bob was impressed, clearly Nina had a sense for the product, and she had engaged him in an interesting conversation where he learned something. They continued to talk at different company events and over an occasional coffee as he taught her more about cosmetics and the marketplace. When Bob had an appropriate job opening, Nina was promoted into the Cosmetics Division. An entrepreneurial protégé determines their personal goals and seeks mentors who will propel them toward accomplishing what is personally and professionally meaningful. And as a first step, it may be that you need help figuring out your goals. That’s o.k. because when you identify opportunities for career learning, it is easier to enlist the help you need from people you already 4 5 Chandler, Hall, & Kram, 2010. Names and select details have been changed to protect research participants’ anonymity know to begin building your network of mentors. In doing so, an entrepreneurial protégé is authentic and eager to learn about their mentor and from their mentor’s experiences. Alex is another good example. While he was a successful marketing executive for a large corporation, he was just not as happy as he always imagined with his job. He admired his friend Sanjay, who had started his own company and seemed to have a lot of fun doing it. They had lunch on occasion and Alex would ask Sanjay questions about his business and offer his advice on marketing strategy. After a year of talking about his discontent with his wife and a couple of friends, including Sanjay, Alex had clarified his goals and why he wanted to leave. He yearned for the energy and excitement of working for a startup and building something new. Alex left his secure job and comfortable salary to be the sixth employee of a software company. Now, a few years later, he is the chief marketing officer of a highly respected and successful company that is growing at a rapid pace. And he loves it. An entrepreneurial protégé will use feedback and ideas from multiple sources to aid in their career decision-making. Good protégés also realize that their mentoring relationships, like all relationships, require some give-and-take and ensure that they assist their mentors when possible. Thus, mentors (or developers) learn in the process of helping their protégés. When you ask executives, “How do you feel when your protégé succeeds?” They tell usdelighted for him, proud of her, I knew she/he was capable. It feels good. What does this mean to you though? Well, for one thing, people like helping others who are genuinely interested in them and thankful for their assistance. They are particularly enthusiastic when they feel like they learned a lot in the process of helping their protégé. In fact, some of the best mentors feel guilty taking any credit because they feel that they get more out of the experience than their protégé. Finally, Charlotte is our third example. Her relationship with one of her past college professors is a good example of the mutual learning and satisfaction that comes from a high quality developmental relationship, and how this can lead to a stronger developmental network overall. After 5 years of working in the financial services industry, Charlotte began to feel that this was not where she wanted to stay. She found herself most interested in the process of change and how the two firms she had already worked for managed the challenges of adapting to macro environmental changes and the leadership challenges that came with them. After a couple of years of floundering and networking, she decided that she wanted to do some systematic career exploration to find out how her goals had changed and how to move towards them. She reconnected with her professor, who listened and counseled, and suggested others she could talk with working in positions that might be of interest to her. Because of her own relational savvy, Charlotte learned about a new field, enlisted several people working in the field of change management in to her developmental network, and two years later has enrolled in a Masters-degree program to prepare her for this new career. She expresses much gratitude to Professor Kaye, who delights in having enabled her to make this significant change in her career. The two continue to be in touch. Charlotte often recommends her professor as a potential resource in the field of Change Management, and Professor Kaye will send Charlotte’s peers her way should they be struggling with how to do effective career exploration. Mentor and protégé thrive as a result of their relationship. For as many positive examples of the role of mentors and developmental networks that we have, there are also many negative examples of dysfunctional relationships as well as the failures to achieve personal aspirations and goals when individuals do not enlist others in to their developmental networks. We have seen these in our classrooms, with clients and in our research interviews. Unfortunately, poor experiences like these are far too common. By understanding the causes of dysfunction and or the failure to engage in effective relationship building, these negative experiences can be minimized. Decades of research shows that good mentoring relationships are critical for career success. We begin this book explaining why one mentor is not enough in today’s turbulent and challenging work environment. To ensure success, all of us- from new hire to CEO- should create and maintain a network of mentors, known in academic circles as a developmental network. We share stories and invite you to reflect on your own experiences, assess your needs, and cultivate a developmental network that will enable you to thrive. How this book will help you become an Entrepreneurial Protégé We start this book with an overview of mentoring and developmental networks, then discuss why mentoring works and how you need to approach mentoring as an entrepreneurial protégé. In the second section, we review the strengths and limitations of formal mentoring programs, consider the role of leaders in fostering a mentoring culture, underscore the critical importance of peer mentors, and explore the opportunities of reverse mentoring. The third section focuses on mentoring outside of the workplace, special challenges presented by workforce diversity and globalization, and the dark side of mentoring. Finally, we highlight new trends and discuss how organizations can encourage networks of mentoring relationships. Throughout the book we include examples and stories of people whose careers and lives have been enriched because of their developmental networks. In addition, we provide opportunities for self-assessment and pose questions for reflection. We hope this book helps you, our reader, discover your inner entrepreneurial protégé and formulate a plan to create your own developmental network.