University:
Massachusetts Institute of Technology
Course:
15.501/516 | Accounting
Academic year:

2023
Views:

443

Pages:

3
Author:

Ashleigh Obrien

Problem Set #1 CLEAR, CONCISE WRITING Rewrite the following sentences more clearly and concisely. 1. Attempts were made on the part of the engineering staff in regard to the assessment of the project/ THE PROBLEM: Weak subject and verb. Make “the engineering staff” the subject. YOUR REWRITE: 2. They will be given the same treatment as local firms in terms of regulation. THE PROBLEM: Weak verb. Use a strong verb that shows action. YOUR REWRITE: 3. Our report begins with a brief assessment of Norway's key characteristics and macroeconomic climate. The current structure of the Norwegian bottled water industry is then reviewed, and a profit potential analysis is performed. THE PROBLEM: Passive voice. YOUR REWRITE: 4. A Pro/Con analysis has found that adding the new machine to our assembly line would mean interrupting our operations to set up our testing equipment to work with that machinery. THE PROBLEM: (a) weak subject (what is a Pro/Con analysis?); (b) too many phrases (to set up our . . . equipment, to work with that machinery). YOUR REWRITE: 5. XYZ Corporation provides for the running of the plants with its own employees. THE PROBLEM: Weak verb. Use a strong verb that shows action. YOUR REWRITE: 6. Our engineering group recently encountered a video display terminal (VDT) internal procurement situation which will significantly impact the cost of our bank teller machines. THE PROBLEM: Stacked nouns (. . . video display terminal (VDT) internal procurement situation . . . ). YOUR REWRITE: 7. This section presents an overview of the construction industry in Spain. The construction industry in Spain, while somewhat different than the U.S. construction industry, offers several favorable conditions for entry. THE PROBLEM: Repetition of words. YOUR REWRITE: 8. My experience with respect to communication in a business environment has been limited, although I do have some background in communicating in an organizational setting as a result of various positions I held in student government. THE PROBLEM: Unnecessary words. YOUR REWRITE: 9. In serving these customers, Club Med needs to meet the service and facility expectations which accompany these travelers. THE PROBLEM: Stacked nouns (. . . service and facility expectations). YOUR REWRITE: 10. The World Bank has conducted a study on the cost of natural resources. The World Bank report shows that Mexico's resources are one of the cheapest in the world. THE PROBLEM: Unnecessary words. YOUR REWRITE: 11. Corporate tax rates in Thailand are currently the sixth lowest in the developing world. Corporate tax is currently 35%, which is low by the standards of the developing world. THE PROBLEM: Unnecessary words. YOUR REWRITE: 12. In addition, the Ningbo area offered additional benefits of being close to the potential market, close to available employee pools, and easy deep-water port access. THE PROBLEM: Lack of parallel structure. YOUR REWRITE: CRITERIA FOR GRADING The problem sets will be graded 0, 1, or 2 with the grade primarily reflecting the amount of effort that was put into them.