Unit 3 Major Writing Assignment Explaining A Concept

1 Unit 3: Major Writing Assignment Asking for help is a sign of weakness. This is a commonly misunderstood concept when it comes to mental illness. It’s bogged down even further with the stigma that it will affect a career, their standing in society and their social circle: Can I still be in the military if I have depression? Will people trust me if I have anxiety? Will I be labeled crazy? Do I need to let employers know that I am medication? Often times individuals with some form of mental illness will hide their illness from the world. Putting forth a façade of happiness, while on the inside they are screaming, constantly repeating negative talk and reliving painful memories that fuel their mental illness. For a time, they can hold the illness at bay and be able to be productive and happy, they take their illness and stuff it deep down inside their own mind as much as they can. Until it boils over, this usually happens late at night, when they are alone with their thoughts, their demons. This will…more often than not, if left untreated, will lead them down the path of no return, the path of suicide. To combat this misconception, we must first debunk this stigma, educate, and push the idea that asking for help is not a sign of weakness. Now suicide of course, is the extreme, the last ditch effort to end the pain that the mental illness may be causing someone. According to 8 Misconceptions about Mental Health and Mental Illness by Nathan Falde, “When the mentally ill attempt suicide, it’s a cry for help.” Is this a true statement? Is the willingness to take your life a cry the first sign for help? 2 I remember when I was young, and my mother went off the deep end and severely punish me for playing with fire. I was 6 years old and I burned a corner of my room pretty bad, my mother was furious. She beat me, hogtied me, gagged me and threw me into the linen closet in the bathroom. I am not totally sure how long I was left there, but my mother eventually let me out, untied me and threw me on my bed. She didn’t say a word to me as she was untying me, as I lay there I had so many thoughts run through my head. “I’m so stupid.” “What have I done?” “Mommy doesn’t love me.” This incident has haunted me for many years, from my childhood into my adult life. That incident (along with many others that occurred since then) had severely damaged my self-image and my confidence. I second guessed every decision, found it hard to trust people, and felt that I wasn’t worth as much as the dirt off the bottom of a shoe. I kept all my feelings to myself, buried them as deep as I could. All the while I smiled at everyone and pretended to be fine. It’s a hard thing to deal with on a day to day basis, but people would ask if how I was doing and I would always respond with “I’m doing good.” Of all the things I battled, the hardest part of the day, was making everyone around believe I was okay. I didn’t want to let anyone know the pain I was going through. Part of it was I didn’t want to let anyone think I need help, that I was not strong enough to handle this on my own. Another part of it was fear of how my mother would react if I reached out for help from people outside of the family. Eventually everything I tried to bury deep inside began to boil over, I became short with people and lashed out over the smallest infraction. I even began to argue with 3 my mother. While I never flat out came out and said “I need help!”, my actions cried out for me and yet nobody listened. Even though I tried to dropped subtle hints of the help I needed in dealing with the issues I had been going through. It wasn’t until I tried to hurt myself that people began to notice the seriousness of the situation. One day when I was in High School, after a heated argument with my Mother over grades the night before, I had brought a knife to school with the intent of using it on myself. My friend noticed my distraught I was acting and asked what had happened. I showed him the knife and walked off, he followed me. He along with 3 other friends of ours escorted me to the school counselor to get help. I was relieved to relived to get some help, but a small part of me wondered why I let it get to that point before asking for help, and why nobody picked up on it until my attempted suicide. Going back to what Nathan Falde stated in his article, “People suffering from mental health disorders will become suicidal only if their earlier, actual cries for help were not noticed, acknowledged or taken seriously. Failed suicide attempts by the mentally ill are a sign that urgent and immediate intervention is required, but the best course is to respond to the initial cries for help at the time they actually occur.” So what are some of the signs to look for with regards to a loved one reaches out for help. As you may recall, I (along with many others like me) didn’t really come out and say “help me!” It took many years before I eventually got the help that I needed. According National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), “Each illness has its own symptoms, but common signs of mental illness in adults and adolescents can include the following: 4  Confused thinking  Prolonged depression (sadness or irritability)  Feelings of extreme highs and lows  Excessive fears, worries and anxieties  Social withdrawal  Dramatic changes in eating or sleeping habits  Strong feelings of anger  Strange thoughts (delusions)  Seeing or hearing things that aren't there (hallucinations)  Growing inability to cope with daily problems and activities  Suicidal thoughts  Numerous unexplained physical ailments  Substance use These signs will come out in little spurts, so you may not pick up on it at first. If you think about it, you may already know someone who have exhibits these signs. Its tricky to figure out if they indeed need help and once you do, how do you go about providing that help without making them feel awkward or scaring them off. However, if we are ever going to change this misconception, this stigma, we must be willing to step out of our comfort zone. We must be willing to say and do everything we can to show those lost loved ones, that they can find their way back to the light.