Is the stereotype that all Singaporeans are to get married and have kids natured or nurtured? I believe it is nurtured.Singapore is a harmonious society with different religions and ethnicity. Though there are different pressures and standards to adhere to from things like education to career, there is one most if not all can relate to which is the pressure to get married and have kids. Though subtle, this is obvious for young adults receiving questions and remarks from relatives during festivities and government initiatives. Focusing on the ethnic groups in Singapore, it will give us a broad understanding to the general Singapore society.In this paper, I am exploring the stereotype to see if all Singaporeans are pressured to follow the route to get married and have kids and to see where this pressure is coming from –whether it is nature or nurture. First of all, we need to understand that there is a certain pressure coming in for young adults to get married.
The median age of marriage is about 28 years old for women and 30 years old for men. (“Median Age at First Marriage”, 2019) This pressure that they are facing is known as the “Shelf-life” they have before they “expire”. It is often seen more prominent in women as they are considered more based on their physical attractiveness than men are. As the customary of beauty privileges youthful looks, judging women by her appearances constructs a cultural “double standard of aging”. (England and McClintock, 2009)The Chinese people root themselves with the tradition of keeping the family line going. The structure of the Chinese family is built on the concept of filial piety, also expressed by the character, xiao“孝”. The upper part of the character means old while the bottom part means son. It has a wide variation of interpretations but the meaning behind the character, xiao, means that the elderly is to be supported by the younger generation as the young are burdened or oppressed by the old. The purpose is to the continuation of the family line. (Teon, 2016)
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The Chinese people in Singapore still follow the Confucian organization, that marriage and children are essential. (Singaporean Culture) Family is an integral part of confusion value and since the Chinese people follow the Confucius values, family is an important part of Chinese tradition. Marriage would then be pressured upon from the parents to have kids and keep the family line going. (“Almost seven in 10 Chinese feel pressured by family to marry”, 2019)The Malay community in Singapore likewise faces similar pressure to get married. This pressure stems largely from familial and religious expectations where marriage is typically deemed to ease the family’s financial burdens. Additionally, marriage in the eye of the Islamic religion is highly regarded as a necessity for every Muslim individual. According to a demographic study commissioned by AMPwith the intention to analyze population trends of Malay population populace in Singapore, it is evident that a typical Malay household size is higher in comparison to other races. (“Demographic study on Singapore Malays”, 2019)With this, Malay families hope to reduce financial burdenson having to provide for so many family members, by marrying their children off.(“The dilemma of Malay Marriages”, 2017)Additionally, an introduction of a new member to the family would also mean that there is an extra source of financial income to aid in boosting the family’s overall financial income. Therefore, marriage seems like a viable solution to aid in lessening the strain on financial stress for a typically large Malay household unit, as well as a providence of an extra source of income for the family in which one is married into.
Apart from financial reasons, the Islamic religion sees Marriage as a foundation and necessity that every Muslim are expected to adhere to.(AI, 2012)It is even “highly valued and regarded as being half of one’s faith” according to the words of Muhammad, which serves to show that Marriage is of utmost importance as Faith is to the Muslims. With that being said, Marriage is evidently important to the Muslim community which could possibly explain the pressure for one to have to get married.The Indian committee is pressuring Indian individuals to get married fearing the consequences that they will be seen as social and moral aberrations not only by state but the family and Indian community as well. This can be seen by Ramdas’swork where individuals that are single are normally viewed as being too picky or something might be ‘wrong’ with them. (Ramdas, 2012) Indian women who are educated in particular face the social responsibility and pressure to find the suitable man that would ensure the survival of the right Singaporeans family.The religion of the individual also affect the stereotype as the religious side of Hinduism states that individuals ought to get married and have kids as a rite of spiritual growth. It is thus the duty of Hindu parents to see that their daughter is married off. The religion of Christianity states in the bible that you are to procreateand I quote that we are are to “be fruitful and increase in number” according to Genesis1:28. It was the first command given and it states that procreation is the basic purposes of marriage.On the other hand, the government also has got plenty of initiatives to persuade people into getting married and have kids. Things like housing priorities, baby bonuses, and employment leaves. (Cheam, 2013) Married couples who are thinking to purchase their initial HDB flats would receive priority in allocation of new flats. A larger sum of baby bonuses, as well as Medisave allowance, will be given to the family and baby. Married couples get paid paternity leave after delivery of baby while working mothers who adopt gets four weeks of government-paid adoption leave.
The government also provides financial support for conception and delivery as well.As the government is spending close to $2 billion a year, this will only benefit the married couples, parents who are keen on adopting, and mothers who want to conceive. Non-married couples are then marginalized. It will be in no sense benefit the singles who other than not benefiting from the initiatives from the government but will have to wait till 35 years old if they would want to purchase their HDB flats. On top of the already long waiting time, they would still need at least 2 names for to purchase the HDB flats.However, while this is vastly information focusing on the nurtured side of things, we cannot deny that there are cases of nature activities. Getting married and having a family provides contentmentfor individuals, as well as being able to provide for the family. (Tan, 2012) Thoughthis thinking may be changing, they state that they are still chasing the same thing essentially. Based on the above information, it shows how society socially engineers individuals into thinking that marriage is a natural progression.If you do not get married but have plans on starting a family or purchasing your initial HDB flats, you are losing out on all the resources that the government are giving. You may also feel disadvantaged at the fact that you might have to delay your plans on owning your house at an older age. Even though the social institution pressure individuals into adopting this stereotype, there is still options available for individuals to make independent choices, albeit these choices are at a disadvantage. But nonetheless, the stereotype exists as a result of this pressures and thus I feel that this stereotype is nurtured.
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