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Not every marriage has a happily ever after. Mina and Mr. Kapasi have a complicated relationship with their families. Both marriages are failing in multiple ways. Their children play a big role in the failure of their marriages. The willingness to stay faithful to their spouses also aids in the marriages’ downfalls. Love is not always enough to keep a marriage alive, especially if it is one-sided.
Children can make or break a marriage. In Mr. Kapasi and Mina’s case, it broke them. Mr. Kapasi’s son’s death tore and ate away at his marriage until there was nothing but silence between him and his wife. She has little regard for Mr. Kapasi’s career because it is a constant reminder of the son they lost. Mrs. Kapasi starts to “resent[] the other lives he help[s] … to save” because he was unable to save their own son’s life (Lahiri 19). When Mina and her husband had their first child, all of Raj’s attention was diverted to the child. She was jealous of their baby and began to subconsciously hate him. Later, Mina has an illegitimate love child with her husband’s friend. She has felt guilty all these years because of it, but never once mentions it to her husband. As the child, Bobby, gets older, it pains her to see him and be reminded of her mistake. She could not handle being a part of the family any longer.
Mr. Kapasi tried to save his marriage. He works hard to provide financial support for her and his family with “the newer, bigger house, and good schools, and tutors, and fine shoes, and the television, and countless other ways” (Lahiri 19). He sacrificed his “dream[] of being an interpreter for diplomats and dignitaries, resolving conflicts between people and nations, settling disputes of which he alone could understand,” for his family (Lahiri 18). He takes a job as an interpreter for a doctor’s office to pay for his son’s medical bills. He loves his family and works two jobs to make sure they have everything that they want; they are his number one priority. After the death of their son, Mr. Kapasi tries everything in his power to cheer up his wife; unfortunately, none of it is good enough for her. As he and his wife grow more and more distant, he realizes that she no longer loves him. He used to be eager to get home to his wife, but she would only serve him “a cup of tea … in silence” (Lahiri 24). She does not care about his day, or him. He starts staying out later than usual because “the thought of that silence … oppresse[s] him” (Lahiri 24). He is willing to do anything for his family, but he “yearns for some recognition and interest in his life” (Brada Williams 458). Even through it all, Mr. Kapasi continues to try to fix his relationship with his kids and his wife, as well as staying faithful to them.
Unlike Mr. Kapasi, Mina does not care about her marriage. After two years of marriage, Mina was ready to give up. When Mina had their first child, she was “left at home all day with the baby, surrounded by toys that made her trip when she walked or wince when she sat” (Lahiri 26). All her husband’s attention was stolen from her by their baby. They become more distant with each child after. Mina and her husband’s “lack of carefulness in raising their children extends to their carelessness in maintaining their marriage” (Brada-Williams 457). She lashes out and has an affair with Raj’s friend because of his lack of interest in her. She neglects to tell him that Bobby is not his child. Mina lets him believe that she is still in love with him and that they have no flaws in their relationship. She loves her family but values herself far more than them. Mina has a simple life of comfort and ease, but she “yearns to be freed of the responsibilities of [her] marriage and children” (Brada-Williams 458). Mina gives up on her marriage because of the guilt she carries about Bobby; she resents her children. She is more worried about her nails than her children and continuously tells them “[l]eave [her] alone” (Lahiri 16). While Mr. Kapasi is willing to sacrifice his entire career for his family, the most Mina can do is give her daughter a drop of nail polish to keep her quiet. She could not bother to “hold the little girl’s hand as they walk[] to the restroom” (Lahiri 12).
Mina initiates her unhappiness while Mr. Kapasi’s is brought upon him. In each relationship, there is a spouse who is no longer willing to try to keep the family together. Mr. Kapasi is ready to do anything to keep his family together, but Mina could not care less about her marriage or her children. There is no relationship left to salvage in both marriages; they are over.
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