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My phone buzzes. An unfamiliar number with a mysterious number— I later find out it’s from Jhansi (Uttar Pradesh). Profile pic showing a selfie of a 30-something woman, smiling with her son, a strange picture to receive as it's almost black and white, a kind of warrior lady she seems to be.
For the past three years, I have been getting dreams for this woman, Rani Lakshmi Bai. Over the years, I’ve pieced together parts of who she is; middle-aged, female warrior, and very popular, according to Wikipedia and all information I read and learnt after doing deep research. When I received the first dream, I had started taking history class for grade 9, always finding queries regarding about how brave Rani Lakshmi Bai was. Ways to be stronger and courageous like her were the hot topics in the school and with students, especially girls, wherein I can see the spark of Rani's personality. With this new amazing topic, I discover a kind of oozing strength within myself too, so, naturally, I engaged myself in discovering and manifesting a small meet with Rani by envisioning moments with her. And being at strong manifestation, I finally get a chance to meet Rani Lakshmi Bai; a dream come true sensation is beyond anything.
After staring at her for a while, I responded: “WOW”. As time went on, the story of her struggle deepened. She started talking about the struggles in her life, her child's and husband's death, adopting a son later, even about how she wanted to live in Jhansi forever, but how things turned differently.
I was halfway through her life history, for example, when I learned she was the one who gained mythic status in the colonial and nationalist Indian imagination because of her resistance to British rule during the uprising of 1857, a rather ominous-sounding truth. Listening it up, I learned that it was not as easy, as I’d initially thought, but rather more than that image of a leaping horse, sword raised high, with a son clinging to the back. This was around the time when the British military were about to conquer her fort, and instead of surrendering, she is making a dramatic midnight escape from the ramparts. I’d started to spend more time to know more about her. Indeed, it seems to be a thrilling experience to hear Rani telling herself about what happened back then, but also somewhere inside I feel taking all that her powers inside me.
I’m not sure exactly when it happened, but after a while I started to feel sleepy, but after a while when I'm awake I found myself alone in the room and acknowledge myself into a woman who got all of sudden supernatural powers. I wondered if I’d somehow got a sudden rush of some downloads in my body. I was also dealing with changes within aura with blooming positivity; the biggest change being letting go of my old self. I realized that I needed this since so long, but was just waiting for the right moment, but after this meeting with Rani Lakshmi Bai, I finally discovered my hidden self.
Shortly after, I got a phone call from the school to play a historical character in a cultural evening day after tomorrow, and I was so sure which one I'm going to be best at now. Sipping my cup of coffee, I realized that in comparison things back then in those times, our own problems, stress, argument all seemed superficial.
Few minutes later, I got a text from mysterious number: “Congratulations on getting to play 'me', hope you'll rock!”. It had never occurred to me how much Rani's life had influenced me since I had started getting to know more about her. But of course, it did; over time, I’d outgrown old self after this meeting with her, gained the confidence to build a solid foundation to strengthen my students also, and devoted myself to my primary loves of teaching. Why wouldn’t Rani Lakshmi Bai also be settling into her own life too wherever she might be!
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