One of the greatest challenges to a committed relationship is when one partner goes outside to look for a connection. This connection can either be physical or emotional. Going outside to seek from another person what your partner could have given you is termed cheating. So long as a relationship isn't an open relationship, there should be exclusivity.
What is cheating?
Cheating is difficult to define. It is relative. It means different things to different people. people have different notions about what they feel is inappropriate for a partner to indulge in with someone of the opposite sex. Some believe that flirting is a form of cheating. Some others won't even condone an exchange of phone numbers denying being in a relationship or exchanging gifts between their partner and someone of the opposite sex. Cheating leads to a feeling of betrayal and rejection. Those who cheat understand the consequences of what they are doing, little wonder it is always kept a secret. Some people, however, do not like to define what counts as cheating just like the saying, ' If you do not know the rules; you can't break them.' According to Wikipedia: cheating is a violation of a couple's assumed or stated contract regarding emotional and/or social exclusivity.
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Men and women who cheat more?
The society has this stereotype that men cheat more than women. I am not here to propose or oppose that fact, you can help me do that in the comment section. However, it is worthy of note that women are as profoundly sexual and sensual as men. Women also have physical urges that some of them want to be gratified elsewhere. Although men and women tend to think and feel differently about sex.
When a man cheats, there is usually no emotional attachment to it. To them, sex is sex and a relationship is a relationship. That a man cheats doesn't mean he's in love with his mistress or he has stopped loving you. A man can chat without feeling a significant degree of emotional connection. Women, on the other hand, sex most time goes with emotions. When a woman cheats, there is usually an element of romance, intimacy, connection, or love. A man can satisfy his sexual urge with fewer thoughts of intimacy but I dare not say the same about a woman. Before a woman cheats, she considers the possibility of a long term because sex with the wrong guy can lead to unpleasant outcomes even a one-night stand.
The world has been digitalized with technological advancement making cheating so easy. Gone are those days when men were seen as lovers of gadgets and were more likely to cheat using these devices. Nowadays, women especially the younger generation are as involved as men in digital technology. Women Constitute a higher percentage of social media users such as Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and the list is endless. For the most part, women are seeking online what they seek in life which is a meaningful connection, and if the digital connection comes with an element of sexual stimulation, so be it. No thanks to webcams, online sex is now very common with nude sharing and sexting and what have you? Okay just so you know, I have not in any way said women cheat more, I am just saying women cheat as much as men do.
Why do people cheat?
It starts from the little lies to the secrets and deleting of evidence. What hurts most is not the fact that your partner cheated but the lies and the secrets making you feel stupid and like a fool. Why do people cheat? It spans several reasons but I will share with us a few. You can add yours in the comment section.
Incompatibility: cheating occurs because a couple is a mismatch that requires compromise on things the couple does not want to compromise on but has no courage to break up hence they go finding that perfect match out there.
Resentment: the feeling of resentment by a partner can trigger the thoughts of cheating. Going through a rough patch or a moment of weakness and not having your partner be there for you is not a pleasant situation. Busy partners who never spend time with their significant other leave them crying for attention and they might just find it in the arms of a stranger.
Sexual Satisfaction: most relationships cannot survive without sex most especially marriages. Sex is the engine oil of a relationship and good sex bonds partners. When one partner feels unsatisfied or sex-starved, they tend to want to go look for it elsewhere.
Revenge: this is common among women. He cheats on you and then you figure the best way of revenge is to give him a taste of his bitter pill.
Boredom and Curiosity: when the sparks of a new relationship die down and there are no more sizzles, some people miss the exhilarating effects that come from dating, flirting, and being flirted with and if such a person is an adventurous love with a boring partner, then the rest is history.
Lack of self-esteem: This is one of the major reasons why people cheat. Having a partner who constantly downgrades your looks, and career and makes you feel older than your age can make one seek for validation outside wanting to feel desired, appreciated, and alive again.
Serial cheaters: These set of people cannot comprehend the idea of being with just one person for the rest of their lives. They cheat until the cows come home. There is nothing anyone can do to change them unless they make a conscious effort to change.
If the relationship is not a test, why cheat? People should learn to respect their vows and promises. If it is not working out, please have the decency to walk away.
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