I was the girl whom everyone thought to be the ‘’slut’ or better referred to as the ‘’wannabe.’’ I was always looked down upon by others for my so-called hourglass figure and luxurious dark curled hair some called unfair but I called it gifted. I was the girl that everybody thought they knew but didn’t even come close to. I was that girl.
I was twelve when it happened, that strong smell of Axe cologne that just hit me, the colorful decorations that surrounded me, and the joyful laughter of fellow family members dancing and singing to golden hits of the 90s. Easter Sunday, I woke up o the smell of freshly made waffles and homemade honey; I jumped out of bed and ran downstairs to find everyone sitting around the breakfast table eating and laughing away. I finished licking the last bit of honey from my plate and rushed back upstairs to get dressed for the Easter Sunday lunch with the family and friends. I was busy curling my hair when I received a text from Robert; “ can't wait for tonight”. I was smiling from ear to ear when I read the message, but I wasn’t even close to ready for that evening because I was more concerned about who was going to be there from the family and what were they going to judge me on this time. I was ready to let loose and make the rest of the day and night one that was memorable but I was not ready for what had come later that evening that changed my view on men. I was playing some pink lemonade to my wine glass when I bumped into Aunty Janette, she had this bright yellow and blue dress on that was put together with ankle strapped heels; her hair... she was the best part of her look because it was perfectly wrapped into a bun and styled with a cream ribbon. I was complimented by her for my fashion taste and glowing skin, I nearly spilled my drink on her dress after I heard this I was in shock; so many people know me for being a wannabe and slut that I was completely shocked to hear a decent comment about myself coming from someone else.
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The whole family (from both parent's sides) had arrived and some of their friends just in time before we started to pray and eat lunch, I was continuously complimented on my polka dotted dress and well-chosen hairstyle which I couldn’t stop blushing for; at this moment I felt like I was being praised, at this moment... I was happy. The splashes of yellow, pink, blue, green.. it was as though I was looking at the rainbow that never fails to mesmerize someone. I watched as the children's faces gleamed with joy every time they found an Easter egg hidden in the garden, whilst the adults had their own fun around the dining table. I kept checking my phone to see if Robert was online so I could talk about the plans for “tonight,” but there was no reply for what felt like centuries; I eventually decided to enjoy the people and time that I had left with the family and friends around because I wanted a good time too even I’d that meant canceling on Robert. The day turned into night and the fun began to come into place, I remember how Uncle Isiah aggressively tore his shirt apart because he was getting too hot. I remember my eardrums were heavily pounding from the music and my eyes watering until the fog appeared because of the amount of laughter I had from watching Judy dance on the table with her bra; these memories made that Easter Sunday one to remember for years to come.
I didn’t want to be known as a “slut' or a so-called “wannabe” anymore, I wanted to be known as the girl who did what she had to do and was the way she was because of the gift that was given to her. I checked my phone to see if Robert sent a message about the plans that night... he didn’t. I was a little tipsy from the punch that I had drunk when I made my way to the couch to rest my head, while later came Aunty Pat with water for me to drink, it felt as though every inch of my body was revived and awoken with every sip that I took; so refreshing. I laid my head down to stop the pounding when this giant of a man came toward me and sat down. The strong smell of his Axe cologne aroused me as he came closer to me, I felt helpless at this moment because I didn’t have enough strength to speak or move. I slowly lifted myself off the couch and pushed his heavy body away; I went outside for a refill of water but couldn’t help smelling the cologne everywhere I went, it kept lingering throughout the room. The children were covered in chocolate and marshmallow residue around their mouths and on their youthful fingers whilst the adults had their fun prancing and singing until there was no more energy left to move. I checked my phone and saw a message from Ruby saying that Robert was caught kissing another girl at his Easter Lunch, I called him immediately after seeing the message; he denied the accusation and called me a “slut” for thinking he'd do such a thing. I began to cry with every tear rolling down my wet face, then the giant man came to try to comfort me but I pushed him away because I wasn’t in need of comfort at the moment. I wanted to take time alone after everyone left drunk and forgotten, this way I could hide under my fake mask and forget about everything that happened.
I wanted to forget about all the comments and judgments made by the people, whether I was called by the famous nicknames “slut, wannabe' or simply complimented on my figure; I wanted to be known as the girl who had no label. I wanted to be the girl known as “The Unknown.”