Whenever we mention Christmas, we would feel joyful and immediately think about the most wonderful time of the year. Although, it is not questionable why it is considered and called the “most wonderful time of the year” for the mere occasion itself gives off a different feeling of excitement. Back then, it was that time of the year where I would wish for time to slow down for a moment, for I get to experience and feel that my heart is genuinely happy. Every year, I would always look forward for it. However, at some point, time and fate had its own way of changing how I felt about Christmas vacations.
As a kid, I believed that the reason why Christmas vacations are worthwhile is because we get to do so many things. Just the mere thought of decorating the house and having gifts under the Christmas tree, was enough to make me excited. Since I rarely see my relatives, their visit was something I would always look forward to. I also remember considering myself lucky since my birthday comes three days after Christmas. I started to think that everything was going my way since there were just so much things to look forward to and to be excited about. Maybe which is why when those things slowly started to disappear, my Christmas spirit also started to fade away.
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Based on personal experience, the eagerness of looking forward in Christmas vacations started to slowly fade away. As years passed, fewer and fewer of our relatives visited us, until it came to the point that they stopped visiting. The little things that makes up Christmas such as decorating, gift-giving and bonding that we used to do back then, is now gone. In addition to this, I remember being ecstatic whenever my birthday was just around the corner, but now, I cannot even remember the last time I wanted to celebrate it. Since everything that I used to look forward to became a blurry memory, I decided to drown myself in school works and responsibilities even if I was on vacation. I thought that maybe if I kept myself busy, I would forget the longing of the Christmas that I used to have. A longing that slowly built up in me, yet no one knows.
Fortunately, time passed and I slowly realized the true essence of Christmas. It came to the point that I decided to think everything through and ask myself, “Did Christmas really change throughout the years or was it just me?” I realized that maybe it was the feeling of contentment that I had when I was younger, that slowly went away. As a coping mechanism, I grew up asking for more and decided to put the blame on other people. I almost forgot the real essence of why we are celebrating Christmas. To make up for everything, I slowly taught myself to appreciate the presence of my family and the thought of how fortunate I am to spend the Christmas with them. I became truly grateful for the ones who gave me strength to survive through every experience and the whole year. Everything was not just for my family, but also for the Lord.
Each of us have our own different experiences about Christmas vacations that may shape our whole perspective, whether it may be temporarily or permanently. The experiences and realizations that I had is what I used to become a better version of myself than I was before. I learned how to be thankful for the little things that I had in life. Then I realize, maybe all of the love and gratefulness we express towards everything and everyone around us is what truly makes Christmas the most wonderful time of the year. However, to have a life that is wonderful and worth living, one must be willing to openly express themselves not just when it is Christmas, but in their everyday lives.
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