Domestic violence is where one partner tries to have the power or control over their significant other in certain aspects of their lives. Some examples of this are what they wear, where they go, and who they talk to. More people need to become more aware of domestic violence so we may one day prevent this issue. It is so shocking to me when I read everything these people have gone through just because they loved someone. Domestic violence is a very hard thing to go through and can affect anyone. Domestic Violence can start off from small things such as an “oh, you can not wear that!” to the partner being dead.
In most cases, it starts as a small thing like yelling but can grow to be beaten every day or even killed. “Although all three types of intimate partner violence can be either frequent or infrequent … and can range from relatively minor acts of violence to homicidal assaults, intimate terrorism is the type most likely to be frequent and brutal” (Domestic Violence: It’s Not About Gender: Or Is It? ).
I have read quite a few cases in which people have been stabbed, shot, beaten, hung, had boiling hot water poured over their bodies, emotionally abused, sexually abused, economic abuse, digital abuse, psychological abuse, and family members killed. Emotional abuse is when your significant other belittle you over little things ranging from what you could be wearing, who you are able to socialize with, or traumatic events they could have gone through as a child. Sexual abuse could be unwanted touching, rape, calling their partner sexual names, making their partner dress a certain way, or withholding sex from the partner to punish them. Economic abuse could be not letting their partner use their own money or making them stay home from work or school. Digital abuse is keeping each other’s passwords or checking each other’s phones. Psychological abuse is making the other person feel intimidated, Isolating them from their friends or family, or threatening to hurt or kill the significant other friends or family. “In the United States, an average of 20 people are physically abused by intimate partners every minute. This equates to more than 10 million abuse victims annually.’’( NCADV. (2015). Domestic violence national statistics). Furthermore, there are many different types of domestic violence abuse that more people need to become aware of so they can see the signs to help the victims. In some cases the abuser just likes the power and control they have over their significant other, it has nothing to do with not loving them. The idea of being in charge is so important to the abuser that they will go to such extensive links to be in charge, even if they love their partners. Some signs of domestic violence include insults, threatening to kill your pets, destroying your property, playing mind games, and intimidating their significant others with weapons such as guns or knives.
This is upsetting to me because I believe no one should ever go through anything like this, it is just inhumane to treat someone who loves you like that. “It can take time for a survivor to adjust to living in a safe environment especially if a predator was severely violent and or committed the actions over an extended period of time.” (Joyful Heart Foundation) The advice I would give someone who is going through this is just getting out as soon as possible or to talk to someone they trust to help them. I know it hurts to leave someone you love and care for, but I would rather be upset than dead because a lot of these cases ended with someone dead or severely injured mentally and physically. “Children who witness domestic violence or are victims of abuse themselves are at serious risk for long-term physical and mental health problems.” (Office on Women’s Health). Children and young adults need to be shown love and care, not violence and pain. One reason people tend to stay in an abusive relationship is so their kids do not grow up in a broken home, but it causes more problems for a child to see the effects of the abuse than to grow up in a broken home.
In some cases, people stay for their kids but no kid wants to see their parent being abused, it is worse to see that than to live in a split home where your parents are not together. In my opinion, this should be a much bigger deal than it is. There are shelters closing down because of lack of funding, so where do the domestic violence victims go to now? American culture has the idea that a child must have a mother and a father in their life so that the family is complete, so the victim that is being abused decides to stay and stick through whatever abuse their partner is inflicting upon them so that they could have a “perfect family” (The Particular Cruelty of Domestic Violence). Putting a kid through such traumatic events can leave them being scarred for life. In the United States, an estimated 15 million kids live in a home where domestic violence is taking place.
With limited resources, it is hard for the people who go through this daily to leave when there is nowhere to go. Domestic violence affects a diverse group of people and is pretty common in this day and age. Not only does it affect the abuser, but their families as well, especially when it ends with an unfortunate death of a loved one. Some cases are worse than others, but it still hurts dealing with whatever the victim goes through. The children that see their parents going through this sometimes end up growing up looking for the signs of abusers because that’s all they know. More people need to be aware of domestic violence so they can never go through it and they can help someone who is going through these situations.